"Now I Tiptoe... Just In Case" | Why Tiptoe Has Hit So Hard

00:00:00: So in nineteen ninety-nine it was I remember it.

00:00:03: Nineteen ninety nine.

00:00:06: It must have been Summer, he's headed up to summer nineteen ninety nine and i Was sixteen years old just coming up the sixteen actually And had being out for like a year?

00:00:19: Well sort of how an a queer drama landed on channel four and it felt Like a door being kicked in.

00:00:25: tofu tailors with me today.

00:00:26: so for hi Hi!

00:00:27: I know all about doors being kicked.

00:00:29: you're always having yours kicked in.

00:00:31: A bit of a career out there, love.

00:00:34: Queer as Folk was.

00:00:36: honestly when it arrived on television in the late nineties... ...was more than just The Breath Of Fresh Air.

00:00:40: It's like a lifeline for queer people.

00:00:42: As someone who is a touch younger then me Do you remember what it landed?

00:00:44: How old were you?

00:00:46: I Was ten i think Ten eleven and I remember watching at night Like where my parents kind of went out.. ..I was lucky we had sitting room with separate television Yeah And I used to watch my Naughties Darcy To Watch Euro Trash

00:00:58: Same.

00:00:59: Things like anything channel five after ten o'clock.

00:01:03: but no, I mean it's a huge deal isn't there?

00:01:06: Yeah yeah and i was the same age as Nathan at that point.

00:01:09: so I felt a real affinity with Nathan...I wanted to be Nathan.

00:01:11: No apology!

00:01:12: No permission asked!

00:01:13: Queer has.

00:01:14: Focke arrived on a tide that was going our way And you could feel it.

00:01:18: The world is getting queer and we were getting more and more right.

00:01:22: Fast forward all these years, Russell T. Davis the writer of Queer is focused back with a show called Tiptoe.

00:01:26: Morning everybody!

00:01:28: Morning boss.

00:01:29: So this morning I'm locked out in my own house so go next door There's The Neighbours

00:01:34: son, fresh up at shower

00:01:36: Dripping...I am going to share something that happened on the first episode of Tipto which if you compare it to some of the... Russell T. Davis is famous for these speechy bits, isn't he?

00:01:49: Where a character gives a bit of a speech about the state of the world and really sums up the show And it does feel like a speech in somehow-it works.

00:01:55: He does that on Doctor Who as well.

00:01:56: Compare this kind of speech You would have got in nineteen ninety nine.

00:02:00: This is the character Melba On The New Show Tiptoe Which drops on Channel Four at the weekend And his speech genuinely left me speechless About where we are.

00:02:10: Everything's coming back from the nineties.

00:02:16: We were despised, but you read this stuff online now and it sounds just the same.

00:02:19: Do I think

00:02:20: its coming back?

00:02:21: Yeah It's back!

00:02:23: You f***ing

00:02:23: idiot.

00:02:25: Right Now Its here...it is a storm..its tights A great big tsunami And we are in the middle of it right now.

00:02:32: do i think its come back?

00:02:34: Even if you asked me in nineteen ninety six what would you think?

00:02:36: twenty-twenty six will be like?

00:02:38: I'd have said

00:02:38: glory days.

00:02:40: We'll have equality, we will love and kisses.

00:02:43: Will be holding hands, skipping down the streets.

00:02:49: They tricked us didn't they?

00:02:50: You're just waiting or did let all come out?

00:02:56: so now were standing in open ready for them to shoot us down.

00:03:00: Do you think that really?

00:03:01: Look

00:03:02: at me.

00:03:02: I'm as proud of anything

00:03:04: but past couple years i am a lot more careful.

00:03:10: You just started a great big round.

00:03:13: On Canal

00:03:14: Street, home turf but out there

00:03:19: I used to walk into the

00:03:20: room and go tana.

00:03:25: Now i tiptoe

00:03:27: Just in case

00:03:30: My guest today has watched the first two episodes.

00:03:32: That's one moment.

00:03:33: Melbus speech will be remembered In queer history forever.

00:03:35: This is Outcast World Queer politics.

00:03:38: When Farad says jumped Labor might say, how high?

00:03:42: And it's not true.

00:03:43: It is offering

00:03:43: people false hope.

00:03:46: Sex.

00:03:47: Vating apps have become a breeding ground for the worst of human behaviors.

00:03:53: What do you want to help me with?

00:03:54: We get together and we... Be simple.

00:03:57: Simple!

00:03:58: Be simple.

00:03:58: from here You will like go nudge himself off.

00:04:02: This is Outcast

00:04:03: World.

00:04:04: Welcome Hello Tofu Hai

00:04:07: Hi Hawaii.

00:04:14: Yeah, I think everyone is.

00:04:15: And after watching this two episodes last night... It's almost like it made you face the music a little bit easier to distract us?

00:04:24: I don't know what he said about Melva that just highlighting how bleak things are because we're in their new type of world.

00:04:36: and i think they were all waiting for this idea of pendulum swinging And I really believe that, but then you just realise we're in a different world now.

00:04:44: We don't know what our future looks like... ...in terms of technology.

00:04:46: and so if we can't rely on the pendulum swinging anymore which is i think the ominous thing?

00:04:53: I think the interesting things from the Melba perspective.

00:04:56: when.. ..we all know her Melba.

00:04:57: she's sat there.

00:04:58: She looks sad a bit old!

00:05:00: She has lived her life ,she's in The Pub You Know But shes a sage & she sees whats going On !

00:05:06: I keep getting quite close to crying about this Because I just feel like we've been living in a bubble and lying to ourselves about the direction of travel.

00:05:18: Canal Street, you work for Clone Zone... We were talking about this years ago when there are attacks on store that used open the clone zone shop.

00:05:26: people used to walk-in.

00:05:29: We got smashed up five times In two months Five.

00:05:34: then we had to replace our glass windows frontage with steel Because there's just no point putting the glass back in because they're just break it again.

00:05:41: So, It is like a weird thing of.

00:05:45: are we going to be resilient and adapt or get on with that?

00:05:47: Or are you gonna face reality this as new reality now where people are radicalized into being homophobic... ...because its easier to be homophobic than to place blame.

00:06:00: what was really going on at the world?

00:06:01: I don't know The scapegoating of queer people showing its head differently now, because we're watching people getting radicalized online at such a rate that... We've never experienced or it like I said is the new normal.

00:06:18: It's a new reality which again means back into there.

00:06:22: The comfort and idea to swing back in place does not as intelligent way of thinking I believe.

00:06:31: personally i think we have really buckled up for what could potentially be coming Brutal, I mean it could be terrifying but we can't just get comfortable.

00:06:42: And then people like you and i get oh they're so preachy leftist gays.

00:06:47: You are a social justice where someone has to leave.

00:06:50: Years & years was the show few years ago.

00:06:52: Oh my god.

00:06:53: of course years & years too.

00:06:54: Yeah yeah and Russell was able...I'm not gonna say see into the future But anyone who'd done work about the direction of travel Was going to see The sort things that were going happen.

00:07:02: He's doing same thing again but its come back To community.

00:07:05: he started his working with.

00:07:06: And there's just such an, I've spent a day with such an unease.

00:07:10: I watched that Melba speech about three times and it made me cry about the tide of hate and violence and division thats coming in.

00:07:17: The thing is its same for trans people i know who were getting on with their lives then.

00:07:23: all this shit happened and the government has pushed them back out of public life or as attempted to And we're now left in a situation where they encouraged us to come out, sure.

00:07:35: They encourage just stand there and say here I am... ...and oh yeah!

00:07:39: We've got nowhere to

00:07:40: hide.".

00:07:40: It takes something like a TV drama to punch through that stuff.

00:07:43: sometimes Like the opening scene is so... If you haven't seen it might as well tell ya.

00:07:48: The opening scene Is Alan Cummings character strung up from a lamppost being lynched by a presumed next door neighbour.

00:07:56: Then fast forward into the tender My hair's on the fucking... Yeah

00:08:01: So like that's what I really admired about it when i was watching.

00:08:05: yet because It takes a fucking lot to shock me Like you know with my industry and stuff.

00:08:10: It takes the hell of a lot, I love horror films.

00:08:12: I Love insane intense stories in crime.

00:08:15: That really fucking shocked him though Wow!

00:08:17: That's Really not What I expected to see immediately but I guess that's The magic of it And that's the.

00:08:23: it is almost like leaning into what Melville were saying.

00:08:25: we have To face the reality just how bleak and dark this can get And not be too comfortable with what we assume and presume like shit can get really fucking dark.

00:08:35: It just because some things, when you read a headlines in this, it's no our personal trauma?

00:08:39: This shit happens!

00:08:41: And could potentially happen again and again.

00:08:44: then that was the... I don't want to say is beautiful cause its' not as horrific but i love that made me think differently straight away from the first- this happened on the first second of the show.

00:08:56: Oh, yeah.

00:08:57: At that point you are committed to the entire series aren't ya?

00:09:00: Like

00:09:00: how the

00:09:00: fuck has this happened but it's such an interesting choice of things.

00:09:08: a man strung up from a lamppost is so visceral like Black people have that done to them for generations in the US, lynchings and that kind of thing.

00:09:17: And it's that kind Of mob justice based on nothing so interesting.

00:09:21: another really interesting thing is The wormhole or what everyone's doing?

00:09:24: On the internet at night In their bed and they cut through the different things.

00:09:28: the young boy I'm not At That stage yet but i think he'S obviously gay um and He's on some sort of like.

00:09:33: I don't know.

00:09:33: no porn I wouldn't go near.

00:09:37: Is he like an anime animal like hot Not Like animal, but like anime.

00:09:42: freely.

00:09:42: drawings of that must like you know a very overly.

00:09:45: Yes.

00:09:45: Overly AI style muscular six pack guys.

00:09:49: then the brother is doing only fans call intent in his bedroom.

00:09:52: Brother's

00:09:52: hot as fuck.

00:09:53: light he's one can for fans and earning cash on.

00:09:57: yes four dollars five dollar.

00:09:59: And Then The Dad Is Watching People Getting Murdered On Twitter?

00:10:03: And The Mum Is Listening To An Audio Book Which Kind Of Leans Into Like A Sexual Vibe Story.

00:10:08: She Begins Masturbating In There.

00:10:10: the three like the sun is masturbating on only fans.

00:10:12: The other sons masturbate in watching this porn, there's free view porn and mum's masturbating to book at same time that dad is watching.

00:10:21: he's not masturbating with dad.

00:10:22: it was almost a similar.

00:10:23: obviously his getting off from watching trauma yeah violence.

00:10:28: I think thats such really visceral way of expressing how the world is right now.

00:10:34: people are so used Like even me on Twitter, like today.

00:10:39: I was scrolling... ...on my adult content twitter.

00:10:42: And there's so much- There are so many brutality videos!

00:10:45: Oh it

00:10:46: has loads and they drop them in randomly?

00:10:48: Yeah you're just scrolling your feed.. ..and seeing somebody get- But i saw someone the other day hold onto an electric rail bar and explode.

00:10:56: And i'm like

00:10:56: great!!

00:10:57: I was on a fucking tube when i watched that as well.

00:10:59: how much Jesus.

00:11:01: It speaks to what we are normalising.

00:11:05: X normalises it I think, x normalises everything.

00:11:07: If you were to scroll through... You know what?

00:11:09: X goes oh but its porn

00:11:10: your after.

00:11:11: Porn,

00:11:12: porn or forty-five second clips of whatever all tastes as some of is just amateurs and every now and again there's one someone's injecting themselves.

00:11:22: Someone looks younger than they should be And like What the fuck has been fired out.

00:11:27: who's responsible for this?

00:11:29: why Is this happening?

00:11:30: i haven't asked For This.

00:11:32: There's a content factory, there is a factory of hate and violence.

00:11:36: And extreme contents... Well as one person in particular it comes from doesn't it?

00:11:40: A man on the United States who went around and reduced USAID contributions and now millions Africans are going to die and HIV won't be eradicated by twenty-thirty.

00:11:51: This was reality if world were currently living in.

00:11:55: We're On The Front Of This as queer people are on the front of this.

00:12:00: Russell T Davis spoke to one

00:12:21: ten million LGBTQI people and I'll show you ten million different stories.

00:12:25: Plus, even

00:12:26: if we try to say the same thing – The world around us keeps changing And the laws keep changing

00:12:30: and prejudice

00:12:30: keeps changing and acceptance kept changing.

00:12:33: so there's always a new story.

00:12:36: So we've seen a lot of gentrification across London, across Birmingham.

00:12:40: We are seeing it around Canal Street.

00:12:43: so we have seen that across London and around Canal street.

00:12:46: now How important

00:12:47: are LGBT spaces in the current climate?

00:12:50: I think they're very important.

00:12:51: The fight against gentrifications is always on... ...I keep on winning.

00:12:54: to be honest That's what kind people we are.

00:12:56: If you go sit down singing at a basement to survive then we will.

00:13:00: So, and I think in our streets it's still good.

00:13:01: It is hard with the bars but we're fighting back very well.

00:13:04: Thank you so much.

00:13:08: That was a great pleasure!

00:13:09: He's cute.

00:13:09: He is cute, Russell T Davies.

00:13:12: And

00:13:12: he touches on another thing there about queer spaces disappearing.

00:13:16: where are all going to go?

00:13:17: The place were just gonna go online aren't they?

00:13:20: For me that has been the nature of what your saying here What a queer space will be.

00:13:24: do need them for one drink or two you know, spaces where historically we've been able to hide from the real world.

00:13:34: Canal Street as a concept in Manchester since the fifties has been a place that people have gone to hide form prejudice and there's- There is a real sense of community here.

00:13:43: I'd be watching something on um...I'll be watching their history channel recently And they're doing this like World War Two for Americans voiced by Tom Hanks.

00:13:53: Oh yeah!

00:13:54: I keep seeing it.

00:13:56: Have you seen?

00:13:56: It's

00:13:57: all my home page when i turn my TV on.

00:13:59: It's

00:13:59: actually quite good.

00:14:00: I mean, it just...

00:14:02: And watched it?

00:14:03: Well you take you through what happened and like you think- You didn't really know.

00:14:07: Like Poland eradicated not just militarily but a war of annihilation.

00:14:11: Kill the Jews on population.

00:14:13: Just make room to fuck off.

00:14:15: That was the idea.

00:14:15: We need space.

00:14:17: Forget people.

00:14:17: kill them.

00:14:20: As your taking though the ruthlessness how that happens and the kind of people that they would just go into a town, right?

00:14:29: Anyone who's got anything to say for themselves.

00:14:31: Well-known people, businessmen, newspaper owners politicians intellectuals homosexuals but guns in the back of their head And tell me we're not reaching that world now.

00:14:41: In fact We already are!

00:14:42: We're already in that world Right Now...in Europe And were already supporting That Kind Of World In The Ongoing And Expanding War In Middle East Over A Greater Israel.

00:14:54: It's only a matter of time, they call it the Imperial Boomerang.

00:15:10: under a reform government and we're still looking at this is that queer spaces will be like the fifties, Like the eighties.

00:15:16: The raid of the RVT in the eightes where police turned up wearing rubber gloves because they didn't want to handle AIDS as they would have seen it.

00:15:24: I can see that world coming back pretty quick.

00:15:29: We had the reform call been sold.

00:15:32: this idea that gay men and trans people are here to groom and fuck your children.

00:15:36: When in reality, when you look at the statistics from data on patterns of society as a whole... The people who statistically molesting raping grooming harassing driving children or young people suicide?

00:15:48: Straight white man!

00:15:50: But I'm not signing petitions or promoting the streets through eradicating straight white men for being public spaces.

00:15:57: I'm not voting against that right.

00:15:59: i don't want to have reduced access to healthcare like.

00:16:02: I just wanted everyone to leave each other the fuck alone.

00:16:04: but we live in this new and you know now where people didn't realize they're an occult's, and he would realize if they've been sold.

00:16:11: the idea of the world is actually.

00:16:14: Actually incorrect for most part and very intellectually dishonest which is dangerous because it makes me feel very confident being wrong.

00:16:22: The the interesting thing I've seen so far and i'm waiting until tonight to get on to episode number two because we're me and my husband are like a pact when it comes to certainty v shows.

00:16:35: The interesting thing is that, but then very fast nature of homophobia and prejudice.

00:16:41: It starts off with A Thing.

00:16:44: You can't say here he's sixteen And you kind of go all right.

00:16:47: That means well thats fine Thats fine even if you don't trust your neighbour without that on you something else, and you lot are always this.

00:16:56: And then before you know it You've got a mind being stronger from a lamppost I don't know.

00:17:01: sounds like quite a fucking like quite stretch but

00:17:04: Yeah But that's how happens.

00:17:06: yeah people need to think they'll we get like he said where people now We have to be really aware of just help How bad this can get in?

00:17:12: How quickly.

00:17:13: and i think i talk about my past somewhere.

00:17:15: i grew up.

00:17:16: i Know the people roll their eyes at there.

00:17:18: I grew up around white nationalists and very, very hateful dangerous people.

00:17:21: i don't talk about it to make myself sound interesting... Oh!

00:17:24: ...I'd talked about that because it traumatized me It destroyed my childhood..it destroyed my education ..and completely walked the way of looking at people in this world Because I saw from a young age how evil can happen.

00:17:36: very fast You know?

00:17:37: Stephen Lawrence was lynched outside on front door for being black

00:17:41: A literal- I mean stab but yeah..a linching.

00:17:45: It's a lynch mob.

00:17:45: they came after him.

00:17:47: It was dubbed out as either of our home, and he died a hundred fifty meters up the road on Well Hall Road to the right.

00:17:51: And we moved house because there were TV cameras... Right?

00:17:57: Yeah!

00:17:57: Because they had two kids who have cameras in their face like having to face murder every day which I understood.

00:18:04: but ...and people need to realise that i'm not trying to preach for anyone or sound sanctimonious.

00:18:13: this shit can happen and it will happen.

00:18:15: And we really have to be hyper aware of the cruelty, what weird type... What are you like kind of ignoring?

00:18:20: because?

00:18:21: The more that we ignore these politicians or these influences or whoever always get older just doing if they're just rage-baiting no!

00:18:29: We really had a challenge with stuff probably cause To us people who are a bit more technologically or social media like a no sabi They could look at see it for what, oh that's just a bit of rage bait but you know.

00:18:42: You need to think about people out there who are going to absorb this fact and they're like marinating right now with this hate which is then gonna be projected.

00:18:54: as we've all seen its been muslims ,it has been black people or gay men.

00:18:58: no its trans people I don't even know.

00:19:05: lock on to the idea that this is a very real dangerous thing and we can watch tv shows.

00:19:10: i think oh that would never happen to me but you just don't know.

00:19:13: And look at people who are enabling it.

00:19:14: on my show after the do the ginger friend dad keys.

00:19:19: why do I know her from she being on coronation street or something?

00:19:21: don't no wire now.

00:19:23: It's familiar iraq nice face

00:19:25: like you lot with all your freedoms and it's like there's.

00:19:29: somebody should have been an ally of us all of sudden, It's like, you've gone too far and it's not the guy that strung them up.

00:19:38: There is an obvious story there but its about people in particular.

00:19:43: actually women are in a unique position to be able influence their husbands or sons.

00:19:48: I think when it comes to being kind of different.

00:19:51: for me That should probably have been the bottom rung as your teacher kid And I know it used to come across in Britain as, don't my mum use the black... Mum that man's on a wheelchair.

00:20:05: Don't!

00:20:06: My mum would just smack her butt like...

00:20:11: Might have be like we don't do that but you learn that stuff and i think mums That woman stands out in particular is where the slide and scale of society with these things are unable to happen.

00:20:25: It begins with our allies who say guys you've gone too far.

00:20:32: There is a massive promotion emphasis on loads of platforms now, like oh god the left have gone too far.

00:20:38: They were pronounced for their microwaves and shit.

00:20:41: It's like I'm sorry...I am not sorry actually if The biggest stress or no such simplified way looking at it But just want to say out loud If the biggest Stress of your day Or you're your biggest Crack in your communication skills Is having to refer someone as Dain instead of he or she Then i'm sorry You're having a good day and you live in very boring fucking life.

00:21:03: Because I wish that was like, I'm a obviously very visibly gay guy.

00:21:07: even when i try to not be or just look gay my mannerism is kind of effeminate...I have to analyze everything they do.

00:21:13: everywhere it goes yeah..and ima white blonde gay because Im on the different level at privileged even.

00:21:18: but if ive going for shop at certain time ,if ive leaving my house then ive go into a certain festival am I gonna be safe there?

00:21:26: But with u id worry about u sometimes Fucking I can blend.

00:21:30: I've got, I shave my hair off or wear a baseball cap all the time covered in tattoos.

00:21:35: I can switch it open down a bit you know although they always tell me queer and then.

00:21:39: but i just for You are always worried when we had events on And you were on your way there?

00:21:43: I never at ten years ago I wouldn't bothered Me because people more living like live.

00:21:47: But now I do worry about you on the tube On the way to one of our event.

00:21:51: The thing that was worked For me again referencing My childhood is I instinctively Do not trust general public because of my childhood.

00:22:00: So that makes you develop street smarts, yeah like my friend Becca came in from LA and she's from Boyle Heights East Los Angeles which is the gang central.

00:22:10: some might call it a ghetto.

00:22:11: It has got really bad rap.

00:22:13: I think its beautiful.

00:22:14: i think Its on the most amazing place ever.

00:22:16: so its beautiful.

00:22:16: The food is incredible but its gotta rap.

00:22:19: And when she was in London with me, it's like you're so street smart.

00:22:21: I watch her watching everyone.

00:22:23: and yeah because... It's not cause i'm trying to be cool or have street smarts..I don't want to call on our street smart!

00:22:27: I wanna be able go on the train and relax but I have to watch everyones reaction to meet Because at back of my head im waiting for some shit always.

00:22:35: I notice its a living in sense tension which I shouldn t'have too.

00:22:39: That's your childhood as well though isnít that?

00:22:41: That has grown up in Elton being chased & beaten-up by the train station On your way from Soho.

00:22:47: Yeah, like I had one on those charts.

00:22:50: Again i'm not playing with violin here because I have moved on a bit of dumb therapy unhealed but i'm still suspicious.

00:22:55: But...I come from a place of suspicion and the place to protect myself always.

00:23:00: so..i am not kind of person who would be even when im drunk!

00:23:04: Im not that gay in the tube who is rolling around the pole.

00:23:08: I wouldn't wear heels or lingerie on my train.

00:23:10: it doesn't matter how liberal- Not because i m not proud of it, no because i don t think he looks good.

00:23:16: I don't think it's worth getting my face kicked in again, which has happened by the way.

00:23:21: I don' want to worry about breaking bones or being maimed because... ...I couldn't just change my perihelos into trainers and that shouldn't have to happen.

00:23:30: but i'm a realist who didn't beat me many times.

00:23:34: so you can't live in this world of like.

00:23:36: well im gonna express myself when people have to accept me.

00:23:45: You have, haven't you?

00:23:45: You've got misaligned teeth from being beaten.

00:23:50: Pour me a drink!

00:23:54: I'm sure we'll be talking more about the show Tiptoe...I'm sure that will come up on the podcast over in the next few weeks.

00:24:02: It's unlocked a box of feelings for some people and made it put a TikTok out these days.

00:24:06: something happened Yesterday.

00:24:10: I know someone, um...I used to work with someone that works for reform now in an advisory capacity.

00:24:21: Their politics aside they're not bound into the politics but it's a gig you get what i mean?

00:24:29: It is money its work and this person..i won't say This, I know.

00:24:37: But this person said to me yesterday that I watched Tiptoe... Have you seen the first?

00:24:41: That's why i've not seen it yet.

00:24:42: It was just yesterday morning.. ..I watch tiptoe and I'll be honest it left my feeling like empty And sad in a way that have been able to shake since made me feel Like I need more community!

00:24:53: And I'm just like...

00:24:56: Go fuck yourself!

00:24:57: Ask what's really?

00:24:57: Tell them go fuck themselves.

00:25:00: When they finish fucking themselves continue To do it.

00:25:03: Fuck them.

00:25:04: Sorry and there is your friend but No, I can't.

00:25:08: I had a reform... You released some parasite knocked on my front door.

00:25:12: Bear in mind that live next to Brixton.

00:25:14: Yeah but they going around Brixton knocking on doors?

00:25:17: To my place and you could imagine my reaction.

00:25:21: Imagine how Grace fall down again.

00:25:22: They get weird.

00:25:22: if it's time for fuck off though!

00:25:24: Don't swear at me like fucking hell.

00:25:26: do y'know what?

00:25:26: i find loads worse than swearing racism.

00:25:30: Racism

00:25:31: is the new swearing.

00:25:32: This was being a fascist bad character trait.

00:25:36: I don't know about you, but i was just like get the fuck away from my

00:25:38: property.".

00:25:39: This is... You've come to- I can't name where area and tell me exactly right there?

00:25:44: Where are they at?

00:25:45: It's called Brexitish!

00:25:46: Yes it's like on the community stage a massive Irish community that has huge African and massive Caribbean communities Huge Portuguese community Like we're all real melting pot.

00:25:56: but this is kind of numbers of people in my postcode And its like the audacity This area with your little fucking turquoise blue fascist paperwork you printed and cheap ink.

00:26:12: I found it really, I find that if felt not offend what's the word?

00:26:17: It felt like an abuse.

00:26:20: don't give back to me in thinking about it except here

00:26:22: we got sent one Mr Graham Smith my husband's name underneath a message from Nigel Farage fuck you Right, you're listening to Outcast World.

00:26:35: A little bit of a... if you've not seen Tiptoe on Channel Four yet here is a little bit I

00:27:03: go goosebumps.

00:27:04: Generally, I'm... I don't know what to do with my feelings at the moment.

00:27:12: Welcome back now.

00:27:13: it's time for a part of show that we've not done before.

00:27:15: It is time

00:27:16: everybody for Topher Slagbag!

00:27:16: Topher's here.

00:27:17: It's time to

00:27:21: open the Slagbag TOFA.

00:27:24: We've been getting some DMs, we're being popping off.

00:27:26: to be fair!

00:27:27: Been very busy on Tiktok and Instagram you can find us.

00:27:30: this is Outcast World

00:27:31: On There.

00:27:32: but yeah This Is The Part of The Show where we go through Some Of Your Messages And TOFA Will Open Your Slag Bag Shall We?

00:27:38: Do You Want Message Number One Please?

00:27:41: Don't Know

00:27:44: Who This UK Leads For TOFA.

00:27:48: May.

00:27:48: I Need Help.

00:27:49: I've met a guy who's incredible in bed, but he wants to bring toys into it and i've never gone near any of that.

00:27:55: Where the hell do i even start without looking like i've panicked bought the entire shop?

00:27:58: Bit nervous!

00:27:59: But very up for it... What is the crack there?

00:28:02: what you think?

00:28:04: You're the go-to on Sex Toys.

00:28:06: I think he seems like his in perfect position already.. I'm not sure if he says something or he doesn't know where to start.

00:28:11: Start small, patronise yourself.

00:28:13: Like with sex toys they say to everyone patronize yourself.

00:28:16: in the beginning you're gonna think oh that's too small.

00:28:18: That's not powerful enough, start with a very basic simple stuff.

00:28:22: always use out as your base.

00:28:24: then like if for example he is using anal staffs to have a small butt plug Start of a very small prostate massage and go You know what I liked where it pushes but i think can be bigger or rather than put too much in because what happens a lot with toys Is people used something?

00:28:41: It was way too much or they just don't like it and think, I don´t like toys in general obviously because you jumped on the wrong kind of end.

00:28:49: People get hungry with their eyes bigger than your belly when going to...

00:28:53: I'll

00:28:54: have them mixed grill!

00:28:55: And its five kilos of meat.

00:28:57: And you want a little sausage?

00:29:00: Yeah i mean no i do.

00:29:01: but even if you're really experienced with anal sex is not the same as about... No very

00:29:07: different

00:29:08: Very different.

00:29:09: Start small, start with a very simple product and if you need like specific recommendations DM me how... Like I said I would always Yeah.

00:29:18: then in regards to your partner the one who wants to use toys of you just communicate And that seems not the most scary thing to do.

00:29:24: but it really is important be like yeah Just tell them like.

00:29:28: oh i've never really tried.

00:29:29: I'm totally down to this.

00:29:31: But just FYI have never done that before.

00:29:33: It's actually going into my work mode now.

00:29:36: Dex stories and partnerships in bed is such a fucking good way to build your sex life up because you go on an adventure together.

00:29:44: Yeah, because you're both inviting this product into your bedroom And it's exploration for you boat.

00:29:49: It's the real bonding experience.

00:29:52: interesting point You made about start small don't go bigger.

00:29:54: like you'll enjoy the small you might if that you might not when you look at it.

00:30:00: But yeah If you start off with something smaller than you will actually get some pleasure as opposed to just like Hurtting yourself.

00:30:08: Did you know Fun Fact, Outcast World?

00:30:12: Since we've become a bit more globally focused because there's queer people around the world and we're getting a lot of listeners.

00:30:18: Roughly forty-five percent of our listeners are now in The United States which fascinates me.

00:30:24: Fascinate to me!

00:30:24: There is real appetite for queer content.

00:30:26: I

00:30:28: wonder why?

00:30:30: Well, this one comes from Sacramento in the USA.

00:30:33: Topher... I gotta know!

00:30:36: Topher-I gotta now!

00:30:37: I'm going to do it in the style of Patti and Selma.

00:30:39: Topper-I Gotta.

00:30:40: Now is normal that i can only finish a certain way And my new guy thinks its hilarious.

00:30:46: Not on the meanway he's into it.

00:30:48: but now im self conscious.

00:30:50: Is everybody secretly weird in bed as just me?

00:30:53: So idk what was going like when you climax.

00:30:56: What happened there?

00:30:57: Yeah, it's a bit specific but I think usually when someone can only finish a certain way.

00:31:01: It usually comes down to their masturbation routine.

00:31:04: so like if you're whanking your certain way with the dry hand at a certain speed... You can't replicate that for someones body or fruit unless you are Superman!

00:31:14: So there always is ways of training yourself out of this.

00:31:17: As long as they have a decent sex life he ended on positive note.

00:31:24: If that's something you want to change, get yourself a masturbator and start fucking it.

00:31:27: I can only finish

00:31:28: in a certain way.

00:31:30: for me That was like like with a shriek or Like i don't know just so mad like bursting out laughing?

00:31:37: I'd like to know how he finishes up.

00:31:40: I would be inclined to think that yes pullout on wanker Or all He needs is the partner in doggy or something because she gets certain speed at motion.

00:31:49: Yeah But what I would say from my expert POV there?

00:31:54: This sounds like somebody who masturbates and has trained their dick a certain way.

00:31:57: Yeah, you gotta do little bits to train yourself out of it.

00:32:01: The best way I always say to anyone with penis is get a fleshlight or any kind of masturbator that You can afford.

00:32:08: Well

00:32:08: i don't mind if they hear them as an OI.

00:32:10: They're

00:32:10: not for me.

00:32:11: Men love

00:32:11: them than that!

00:32:12: I'm

00:32:13: always like... Get a flesh light Or a masturbator That you can afford And mount it.

00:32:17: Don't frustrate your hands because It kinda defeats the point.

00:32:20: If you are

00:32:22: trying To slow down

00:32:23: Yeah, you want to let learn to come without gripping unless your fucking someone who's very dry and very tight.

00:32:33: You're not going get that because we naturally cover us as you go past the ring like men and women or whoever.

00:32:39: Like you get a nice tight entryway then you got into soft spongy space.

00:32:43: yeah And thats not same with the grip of your hand

00:32:46: Right, yeah.

00:32:46: Yeah it feels totally different.

00:32:48: so right that's from whoever was in Sacramento UK Nottingham Topher.

00:32:52: I've been hooking up with a lad who is let's say very generously built.

00:32:57: How do you

00:32:58: know?

00:32:59: I want to build generously built does not am confused as well.

00:33:03: That means i wanna take things further but i'm generally worried about the logistics.

00:33:07: oh I got no idea!

00:33:08: I get now wow this person talking

00:33:10: in riddles.

00:33:11: how Do I prep properly and make It not awkward?

00:33:13: asking because Google has frightened me.

00:33:16: It's not impossible.

00:33:17: You'd be surprised at the, what is that bit from Heated Rivalry?

00:33:24: when he goes I don't know if it will fit.

00:33:26: and yeah!

00:33:29: Yeah there

00:33:30: are loads of ways to prepare...I mean i kind think they're talking like handling the cock also probably douchey or would you

00:33:36: say?

00:33:37: Sounds a bit like doucheing.

00:33:39: so..i've got some douchein guides already online but doosh properly.

00:33:44: They figure out the best way you do.

00:33:51: Eat well, pay attention to how you poop and how are you eat?

00:33:54: And like say for example if you have an oily dinner probably not the best idea is to have anal sex after it.

00:33:59: If You Have A Very Lactose Heavy Dinner Drink Coffee Don't Do Caffeine Drink.

00:34:06: Eat Fibre Heavy That Like.

00:34:09: Maybe Start Taking Fiber Supplements.

00:34:11: What's It Called?

00:34:13: They're famous sapphires.

00:34:17: Sillium husk, that one!

00:34:18: Yeah

00:34:18: and you'll swear about it don't

00:34:20: ya?

00:34:20: What they does is it firms your poops.

00:34:22: so when you do shoot got less residue within your inner walls Right And then just practice makes perfect.

00:34:30: Take it slow.

00:34:31: lots of lubricant.

00:34:32: Reapplication of lube is really important.

00:34:34: Figuring out the right lube.

00:34:36: for me.

00:34:37: personally I like silicone lube not a lot people do.

00:34:40: For people who are new to anal, I would say get a hybrid which is the water-based silicone because it creates like a pillow around them.

00:34:47: It's just kind of like a buffer or friction reduction routine that does do that douche while practice.

00:34:54: allow your body to release all the water before.

00:34:56: but also remember if you're really worried about douching and stuff Remember this shit happens as they saying You know there aren't not a lot Like that idea, especially if you are dosing because I guess the whole point of doing is to prevent.

00:35:12: If your diet's right before and like what i wouldn't recommend getting a dominoes?

00:35:18: Listen to your body like it.

00:35:20: really they're quite that simple.

00:35:22: learn how your body responds when you eat certain foods or drinks at drink.

00:35:25: so maybe been drinking alcohol all night for sometimes not always best systems more hydrated mission more likely to have diarrhea You know.

00:35:35: But yeah, with anything is like practice makes perfect.

00:35:38: And and then talking to it from a relationship POV or the way you interact with them that I always say to people like yes fine not so want to poop this or not don't wanna paint as the American saying.

00:35:51: but also if your in bed for somebody and you're so nervous about an accident happening?

00:35:56: Like upsetting them that you're not enjoying the sets than maybe shouldn't be embedded there.

00:36:02: Yeah That's it.

00:36:03: If It's Not like an enjoyable experience, why are you doing it at all?

00:36:07: Well ends on this.

00:36:09: Portland USA love it.

00:36:11: Topher my boyfriend and I want to try three so neither of us has done it.

00:36:14: i'm terrified about jealousy ruining everything.

00:36:16: that's the most

00:36:17: common thing.

00:36:18: um how do you actually have the conversation with that tenor into a fight before everyone is even naked.

00:36:22: can i can't help but this one?

00:36:24: It's about laying down as someone who's been in a long-term relationship and obviously i'm fucking gay i mean fucking hell have been in many scenarios and I contact but not too much with your partner whilst you're on the scenario, three some fours could be two couples.

00:36:42: You need to make sure it's good.

00:36:43: cool that... And then leave it at that.

00:36:44: don't be like constantly checking because if you are constantly checking for your partner everything is okay!

00:36:50: The other person who can just go oh we all good will then vibe there something going on and penises will go soft?

00:36:57: That was my advice.

00:36:58: what about yours?

00:37:00: I think there's loads of good...I mean, i'm not great with non-monogamous stuff because i am a very jealous person unfortunately.

00:37:05: But im completely transparent about that!

00:37:06: I was cheated on in my first series through relationship with Troll and he is still working for it.

00:37:11: Blah blah blah.

00:37:11: Unfortunately when people look at me like this they are really shocked.

00:37:14: but Im not like that.

00:37:15: I wish I wasn't.. I probably am not.... I just think its the troll were freeing off.

00:37:19: So theres lots amazing non monogamy experts out here.

00:37:23: I've got a fat close friend who I love Ali Eisman.

00:37:27: Listen to her work.

00:37:28: She's an incredible non-monogamous sex educator amazing woman.

00:37:32: Yeah, just loads and loads of this loads of detailed detail like expert there's like whole podcast series.

00:37:39: So Just make sure you're getting your news from the credible source.

00:37:43: queer politics Sex and culture outcast world

00:37:48: tofu a pleasure as ever.

00:37:49: love.

00:37:50: hopefully get in the studio sometime soon.

00:37:52: I keep on threatening to bring the studio to your house.

00:37:56: That's

00:37:56: really soundproofed as well.

00:37:57: I

00:37:59: bet it is, I'm betting.

00:38:01: Trust me i've tested

00:38:03: that!

00:38:05: So that's where we land been an interesting episode.

00:38:07: thanks for your messages as well Tophers.

00:38:08: always on hand personally or if you want to just DM us.

00:38:11: um on tiktok our instagram.

00:38:12: we're always there Tophert.

00:38:14: thank you as ever for the filth and the feeling in roughly equal measure.

00:38:20: You've watched Tiptoe yet.

00:38:22: We're going to keep this conversation.

00:38:23: go in, tell us where you came down on it?

00:38:25: It's the kind of opposite to the nineteen ninety nine vibe.

00:38:28: here I am at forty three years old...you heard that there first?

00:38:31: I'm forty-three!

00:38:32: ...it's The Future guys and imagine what the future would be like....I didn't think it would be Like This And it upsets me.

00:38:40: um we are At The Opposite Times To Nineteen Ninety Nine and we still got a Labour Government and frankly That Labour government has enabled some Of This..It's Enabled It.

00:38:50: Think about that.

00:38:50: The door, they got kicked back open but then is being quietly slid shut again and that may be exactly why this moment is hitting the way it does.

00:39:02: I'm going to let her have last word because she deserves it.

00:39:05: Tofa i'll see you in a bit.

00:39:06: we're gonna leave with fantastic Melba from Tiptoe on channel

00:39:14: four.

00:39:16: It

00:39:19: marches on and on, hand-on.

00:39:23: And what if this

00:39:24: never swings back?

00:39:26: What if

00:39:26: Trump just keeps on winning forever and ever?

00:39:29: How far will it go?

00:39:30: How much will they hate us?

00:39:32: because they

00:39:32: hate is here...

00:39:34: They really hate us!

00:39:36: Do you know what I think we've always

00:39:39: hated?

00:39:39: as

00:39:39: only now they don't have to pretend anymore.

00:39:43: No History tells there's

00:39:46: one thing that blood and fire, and retribution always happen.

00:39:53: And right now it's coming for us.

00:39:58: We'll see you next

00:40:05: time.